WHEREAS, thunderstorms interspersed with sunbreaks represent an improvement, but fail to meet Council's summer expectations; and
WHEREAS, there has been sufficient wet and dark to drive away even the most persistent Californians for several years; and
WHEREAS, the City coffers cannot long afford the rate at which its most taxworthy private real estate is sliding into Puget Sound; and
WHEREAS, the slugs have all drowned; and
WHEREAS, there is a limit to how much green tomato a City of 500,000 can eat; and
WHEREAS, the Fourth of July sunshine demonstrates that Mother Nature knows how to do it right;
NOW, THEREFORE, BE IT RESOLVED BY THE CITY COUNCIL OF THE CITY OF SEATTLE, THE MAYOR CONCURRING, THAT:
The weather is directed to immediately start acting like SUMMER, or the City Council, the Greater Seattle Chamber of Commerce, and all sunscreen manufacturers will move their teams to Arizona.
Adopted by the City Council the _____ day of _______________, 1997, and signed by me in open session in authentication of its adoption this _____ day of _______________, 1997. ________________________________________ President of the City Council
THE MAYOR CONCURRING: ________________________________________ Norman B. Rice, Mayor
Filed by me this _____ day of _______________, 1997. ________________________________________ City Clerk
(Seal)
7/7/97 V1